To read the rest of this series click here: Newlywed Reflections
As of June 7th, Michael and I have been married for one month!! When we were engaged time seemed to move super slow, since we’ve been married time has flown by! Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about this past month and what I’ve learned, been surprised about or am grateful for. I wanted to share some early things I’ve been learning as a newlywed <3
Things that surprised me:
How immediately our relationship felt different
After our reception, I was waiting for Mike to change out of his tuxedo and I felt sort of lost. I didn’t know where I belonged. I couldn’t wait with my parents because I was married and they just gave me away. I just had this feeling of separateness now that Michael is my husband. We were a new family. We belonged together. It was a strange and unexpected feeling.
On the other hand the next day it felt so normal being with Mike, yet very different at the same time. For example, we went shopping at Forever 21 except this time we were spending our money and I was with my husband. It’s such a hard feeling to explain, but our relationship just felt so solid and strong. I wasn’t just shopping with my boyfriend, I was with my husband.
Being together feels different especially around other people. I feel more confident with him by my side and less awkward.
Real life is better than the honeymoon
We had a wonderful honeymoon in Cuba, I’m so grateful we were able to get away. I miss the evenings where we would sit out on our balcony reading the Bible and our devo books together and just talking and watching Fernando the gecko. At the same time, the reality of life always looms over one’s head while on vacation. Honestly, I was really looking forward to returning home. I wanted to experience everyday life with Michael. To live in our apartment together and go shopping for our home. The first few days back after our vacation was just fun and blissful in a different way.
How much I miss him when we’re apart.
Honestly, I’m glad we’re not together all the time. I need Courtney time and he needs Mike time. At the end of the day, I’m so ready to come home to him. The past few days Mike has been away visiting his dad. I’m grateful he can spend some one on one time with his father especially after all the stress of his AZ course these past few weeks, but I have really missed him these past few days. It’s been so quiet, I miss hearing his voice and silly remarks. At the same time, I’m learning to lean on God for comfort and support when I start to feel sad.
Things I’m grateful for
- How secure I feel in our relationship like we’re not going to break up if something goes wrong
- Having freedom
- How much I anticipate going home to Michael and our home
- Being independent
- Goodbye is never really goodbye
- Being a team, when I go to work it’s for us, I’m helping contribute to our financial goals
- His family feels like my family. I feel a stronger bond with Mike’s family since being married.
- Michael is the sweetest husband ever! Honestly, I’m so blessed.
- One day I came home from work and he had made me supper and did the dishes. He was also about to make the bed which he never does.
- He’s brought me breakfast in bed a couple times.
- Taking care of me when I wasn’t feeling well
- When I cough in the night and he asks if I’m okay
- Checking the oil in my car before I leave
- Installing things for our house
- Organizing our stuff while I’m gone
- Being the best at dishes and cleaning up
- Making sure I have everything I need
Things I’m learning
I can’t look to Michael to define me, complete me or validate me. I know this, but it’s a lot harder to accept it on an everyday level. I’m learning to seek my worth from God. He says I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). I’m in the midst of learning this truth and it’s really hard because I struggle with insecurity and feeling not good enough. I know that to be a good wife to Michael I first need to have a solid relationship with God. One where He is working in my heart to change the things that need to change. I’m so grateful that God brings us through situations where he grows our faith. I don’t want to remain stagnant in my walk with Him.
Things I’m looking forward to
- Having lots of babies (;
- Buying a house
- Both of us getting started in our careers
Click here to read: Newlywed Reflections~Month 2: I thought I’d be a Perfect Wife
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Photography: Camille Marie Photography